You’ve been told that you should be a good person. That you should obey your parents, the government, and some god. That you should find what you like to do, learn more about that thing, make money out of it, and pay taxes. You’ve been told you should find a balance between work and life. You should exercise, save the environment and eat your greens. These are the general decrees. The specifics you get from the teachings, instructions, laws, regulations, guides, holy books, and principles advertised by TV, parents, politicians, schools, authorities, and homeowners’ associations.
And they are all lies.
Rules and norms are all made-up stuff created by those who want to protect their privilege. They are all just attempts to domesticate you into what they call a ‘better person’. Everything to make their lives easier and, most of the time, against your true self. A better person is just a euphemism for a more productive employer, a more subservient son, a student that memorizes whatever they are ordered to, and a compliant taxpayer. In sum, just someone who obeys easier.
But the only thing you should be doing is figuring out who you really are. What do you really want to be doing on this planet during your few trips around the sun?
You‘ve been convinced to settle for feeling fine. You do have an idea of what you would really like to be doing with your life, but your work is fine compared to others. You feel like sometimes your friends aren‘t close enough to really know what you‘re going through, but they‘re fine, at least you have some friends. You would love to have a more intimate relationship with your children, and with your spouse, but the relationships are also fine.
Life is hard for everyone; you’re taught. At least you have a roof over your head and food on the table, so you are probably doing fine. You were taught to make a daily gratitude list of what is working and try not to linger on what isn‘t.
For years, religions have successfully kept people from rebelling by using stories that if they accepted being submissive and following what the religious leaders wrote, they would receive a reward; whether it be 72 virgins, eternal peace, or a privileged place in the sky close to the leader. Today, companies employ a similar method of lying, so that people agree to keep their heads down by saying that if they don‘t rebel and work hard, they can rise through the company hierarchy and have a lot of money in this life.
If you feel uncomfortable about anything in your life, it‘s not because something is wrong with your brain chemistry or because you are ungrateful, but because you were convinced either by parents, bosses, religion, or society to pursue a life that wasn‘t right for you. It wasn’t the one you dreamed of when you were 12 or 16 years old. You were persuaded to live a life that was good for the others, a life that makes your parents proud, that helps your country’s economy grow.
But not a life that is right for you.